Care Packages for the Soul.

Any woman that tells you a care package isn't just as much for her sanity during deployment as it is for her loved one is a filthy liar. This month, I sent out five boxes. I always get a little over-excited the first month (plus, it's a Christmas package, yo!), but trail off by the middle of the deployment. Instead of having a million packages in the beginning, and not having any at the end... I have decided from now on I will send him one awesome package a month. This also helps with the countdown, ya see? Ideally we will send 9 packages the entire deployment (with the exception of my over zealous 5 boxes shipment this month). Soooo, in honor of that 1 down, 8 to go!

This time, I have made it a goal for each package to have a theme. How exciting, right? I like to believe that the husband will find them just as entertaining as I do. If he doesn't, he doesn't say anything. Smart man. And on the next package, our little battle buddy gets to help! Sure he will be more of a bobble-headed, drooling supervisor, but who cares?! All of the subsequent packages this deployment will not only have a woman's touch, but a baby's, too!

We miss you, dude! Keep focused on your mission, and we will be waiting with open arms (and maybe some slobber?) when you come home! Love you, bird!

Bitter Betty

That's me today.

Since the day before my husband came home for his last 8 days home before deployment, my hips have been killing me. After a sonogram we found out it's because our gem of a child decided he wants his head turned towards my hip instead of straight down.

I've come to the realization that movement for the last seven weeks of this pregnancy will be spent mostly on the couch, or in bed. A trip to Walmart puts me in unbearable pain.

And to add to it, the husbandman isn't here for a couple of "coddling" sessions a day. I'll admit it. I'm a 23 year old baby right now.

Laying around is fun until you're forced to do it. I can think of a million better things to do than sit on this stupid couch.


And now I will go back to being nice to people. Being bitter sucks, but I'm over the 24/7 pain.

The Premise of My Return, and a Goodie.

So, since the last time I blogged, life has changed tremendously. We are expecting our first baby, a boy, in just a few short months, the husbandman is gearing up for deployment number two, and I'm a full-time student. The reason for the abrupt return is due to all of the information listed in the preceding sentences. I mean, clearly I'm the first woman in the history of forever that has ever dealt with all three factors at once... right? Right.  (NO.)


Anyhoot. I figure I shall start this off with a deployment "goal" list. Every spouse that has ever gone through deployment has set a list like this for herself/himself. After all, while our men (or women) are off doing their salvation in gargantuan proportions... we need to feel significant too. 

I'll check back next year some time and update exactly where I stand on the goals I have set for myself. 

1. One care package a month. Should help the whole family out.
2. Lose all of the baby weight.
3. To elaborate, train for a 5k (but I really prefer the Color Run which is only 3k)
4. Finish the pre-requisites for the nursing program, and with A's. I  will allow myself one B.
5. Grow my hair out to the middle of my back.
6. Because everyone cares so much about this... successfully breastfeed Nolan for at least 6 months.
7. And because y'all care so much about this too- be successful at cloth diapering.
8. Finish the latch hook project I started last deployment.
9. Learn to shoot a rifle. This chick wants to go hunting next rifle season.
10. Read at least one classic. I'll even go as far as to say it should be Grapes of Wrath.
11. Read the rest of Deeanne Gist's books. 
12. Pay off at least TWO of my school loans.
13. For good measure... learn the choreography to Thriller, in its entirety.

Yeah. This year is going to be a gem. 

What's stopping you?

There are so many people that say "I wish I could...". Why can't you? If you want to travel the world, do it. If you want to go to an Ivy League school, strive for it. If you want to stand on top of the Empire State Building, eating ice cream... what's stopping you?

Far too often we fool ourselves into thinking that dreams are just that, but I believe so much more than that. There is nothing stopping you, from anything. We let ourselves care too much about what others think, especially spouses/family/close friends. If they don't like what you are wearing, who cares? You have to wear it, not them. If they don't approve of your career choice, why stop? They don't have to do it for the rest of their lives. I say this because I have seen an overload of women.... and men.... that allow their worth to be dictated by someone in their life that they believe is so important.

Don't let anyone sell you short. Be you, do you. Stop thinking of other people, and make the person you have to live with every second of your life happy- you. Make you happy. Never stop making yourself happy. You'll regret not doing it when you're 60.

Given with the best intentions, help you with your complications.

I'm a people watcher. I always have been. Lately, I have been realizing that maybe my people watching, isn't so good with an over-analytical brain, such as the one I have. So many things lead me to question, why is the most intelligent species in the world so mindless? They are like sheep, really.

1. When did we fall so far as to wait for colored lights to tell us when to put on the brake and to push the gas? I mean, of course it's safe, but I find it amusing that humans rely so heavily on machines these days that their life on the roads are ran by ever-changing colored lights.

2. "What's the sense in anything, when it's just one more goodbye?"- Stone Sour. It's true. Every person that you allow to enter your life, it's just one more goodbye. Either you will be saying goodbye in the form of a fight, a move, simply drifting apart, or ultimately death. Of course our psyche wouldn't benefit from staying alone for our mortal lives, but everything ends.

3. To elaborate on goodbyes, all of our accomplishments in life are more or less no good to us after the final goodbye. I mean, I know there are things like the wheel, fire, and of course The Vitruvian Man that affect the way every human after them conducts life, but what about those people that won't be much more than mediocre? What if my work never goes recognized? Why did I bust my ass, pay so much for school, etc when it's really just something that will be obsolete once I'm dead?

4. Why do people CARE so much about what other people say/feel? I mean, if someone told me that I was nothing but an ugly cunt, I really wouldn't let it hurt me. They are just one person, in the sea of many. I know who I am, and what I stand for... why would I let other people try to tell me what the definition of Leslie is? I really don't care what my banker, coworker, boss, cohuman thinks. If they don't get me, that's not my fault. Can I change it? No. Why would I bend MYSELF to fit their definitions instead of making their definitions bend to fit me? After all, if I'm going to be mediocre, I might as well make me happy while I have any Earthly value whatsoever, right?

5. Only dream as big as you are willing to fail. If you don't mind falling flat on your face, dream huge. If you are afraid of rejection/humiliation... aim to be as big as the risk you are willing to take. I've been coming to realize this lately. If you aren't willing to take a gigantic risk, why would you expect the world to bend over backwards to reward your accomplishment? Do you think Leonardo Da Vinci was like "Eh, I don't know if I can create one of the best one perspective paintings ever made. I don't know if doing it on wet plaster instead of dry plaster like I'm used to is the best idea. What if their emotions don't come out right?" No. He went for it, and bam... The Last Supper.




I don't know what I'm getting at, exactly, but I sure hope these fixating thoughts are normal. If not, I suppose I'm okay with that too.

Five Things..

I was asked a question yesterday, and it really made me think. "What are five things/values that you will instill in your children".

1. The body is a temple- cherish it. Too often, I believe parents forget to teach their children the number one most important thing. You only have one body, forever. If you give that body to too many people, or fill up that body with too many bad things, that body won't be very happy with you later in life. So remember you don't have a spare body, and just take care of it.

2. Be kind to humans and animals alike. Be kind to animals, for God so trusted us to take care of them. They don't have a voice, so we must be that voice. Take care of them, they are God's creatures and know no limit on love. Apply the same respect to humans, and life will treat you well.

3. Education is important, use it to your advantage. We were fortunate enough to be born in a country that allows us to become as successful as we so please. Take advantage of that good fortune, and appreciate the education that is available. It will take you far in life, for an enriched brain is among the healthiest.

4. Family is irreplaceable. No matter if the family is blood-born or family that has come into your life in the form of friendship, family cannot be replaced. One hand washes the other, as it should.

5. Take care of the Earth. Take care of our Earth, it was here before you. Without the Earth, you are nothing. Respect it, and it will respect you too. Recycle, Reuse, and Save.




Try seeing things through the eyes of a child, for it will be the first time you see clearly.- Leslie Spurlock

Polaroid Project

I believe I am going to start a Polaroid project. I think that people have forgot how refreshing a simple point and shoot Polaroid picture can be. For that reason, I am going to go out and fill up a few (maybe up to 10) rolls of film. I hope to do something big with it, but who knows as of now.

I have taken two "test" shots (above). They reminded me of swimming in my grandmother's pool, then eating watermelon- back when I was a child.





A career without passion is like a night's sleep without a pillow. - Leslie Spurlock